The Diary that Just wasn’t meant to be…

I belong to a couple of Interesting spaces on social media. Towards the end of the year 2019, a gentleman advertised products on one of the spaces and encouraged members to purchase them. They included; personalised notebooks, engraved diaries to mention but a few.

They were beautiful and so I ordered for two personalised diaries. One for myself and the other being a present. I then instructed the the second be delivered to the owner who has a good kilometers out of town. I instructed that mine be held till i returned from my annual pilgrimage to Teso.

On 1st January the “diary” was dispatched to its recipient. I later received a call saying it had reached but they were two. Yes both had left the base and been delivered many kilometres away.

We agreed that I would find a way to get it but bus courier back to kampala was not an option. Along the way it shifted base to another home in the hope that it would be easier for the other person to see me. Between 1st January and July 2020, all three of us have met a couple of times but the diary has not come to these gatherings.

Today all three of us remembered the diary. And we all laughed. It is July, and it is still sealed, many kilometres away.

What I think I am going to do is start a journey for that diary. That whereas I dreamt that I would fill it with plans and thoughts for 2020, it will instead receive writings for me and maybe I shall receive it either as a birthday present for this year or a Christmas present.

Clearly, it wasn’t meant to be filled with my handwriting.

Reminders🌦️🌞

For about a week, my head has been racing with a thousand and one thoughts. Thankfully, the effect has been finding comfort in bed and sleep which is much much better than insomnia which is usually the case.

And then I remembered points in my life when my entire self froze.

With the first, i was in P5 and there was a new this new road safety initiative that was being launched. I was selected to give a speech at the opening that was to attract dignitaries. That evening when i got home i decided to practice my speech. I don’t remember who was lighting the charcoal stove but I felt it great to go sit next to them and practice. I briefly walked away and returned to my speech having been used in the lighting process. I can’t begin to describe the tears and panic that set in. The speech was happening the next day and I was afraid to wake up.

I woke up and I still had to go to that event. It went well.

I was nurtured by the most amazing people. Part of the nurture was exposure and so at University, I was given an opportunity to present to a team in Europe. I was determined to wow and so I got Manila and got working. I told everyone who cared to ask that I was going authentic and wasn’t going to do a power point presentation. I didn’t want to ruin the presentation so I rolled it all up and took it as hand luggage and it was placed in the overhead luggage section. On arrival I was so tired, I carried my bag and walked out of the plane. It is only when I reached passport control that i remembered my presentation. I almost collapsed.

The presentation happened. And it wasn’t a disaster.

On days like this, memories like this are priceless. They are a reminder that the world shall not stop.

A reminder that the sun will shine again sooner than later❤️❤️

Tugs at My Heart

I find sanity and stability in the presence of children. When I feel overwhelmed or need to pace myself, i look for children. They remind me of life and it’s simplicity and beauty.

This week my Sunday school children have heavily been on my mind and it all started with an Audio I received from 6 year old Jonah who i am convinced is called into the ushering ministry. This is because of the continuous running battles I used to have with him just so he could sit in class. He found so much peace in the compound and hugged me when he arrived and before he left for home after church. In the voice note he sent me, he prayed to God that he would see me soon.

This evening I miss James my 11 year old Oak class member. He is a perfectionist who came to class with his little brother. His first gifts were always passed onto the brother and then he would take any other. He is very competitive and seeks to ask me the most complicated questions as if to throw me off balance. He is organised and always has his Bible, notebook and pen with homework always done. Once he forgot his notebook at home and requested his parents to explain to me what had happened 😂

I miss my talking clan. These ones are related and always have a story from either the boys or the girls. Shelly, Kayla, Devine, Manzi, Dean, the other three are now grown and more reserved. I remember the girls once walking to me and asking if I wasn’t lonely.

I miss Victor our pianist in all his littleness. At times he really tried my patience as I failed to comprehend how one could play and talk so much at a go.

Each of the children has a story to them and I miss those interactions. I miss all the parent reports I got every Sunday and all the prayers we uttered for the parents.

Wherever all these children are, I offer a prayer for them, their families. That they will continue to grow in wisdom and in the way of God. That they will remain true to who they are and that they will make those around them smile each day.

L Series #1

This COVID season has taken a toll on parents and children alike especially with the homeschooling approach that has been adopted.

I am yet to meet a parent who is sailing through this period because it’s surely tough. I have met many who are struggling with a number of challenges that range from;

Getting children to attend classes instead of YouTube, having homework done, submitting assignments on time, wondering how to deal with WhatsApp and Instagram alongside class work to mention but a few.

A schedule is a good place to start I told a brilliant young girl I recently met. I encouraged her to draw one up so that she would be able to Pace herself. We agreed on a few time lines and two days later, there is no progress registered.

I shall be as patient as can be as we take this journey together. I hope she can learn early on in life the importance of rituals and routine on her growth journey. I hope she can learn that growth and success are not accidents.

They are returns on investment.

As my High School Motto stated;

“You Reap what you Sow”

The strange beauty of Children…

My neighbors child begins to get active about 9pm. During the day one would doubt there is an almost 2 year old around. She seems to demand that her parents sit on their balcony with her as she screams her lungs out. She has become part of my evening routine.

Her routine this evening got thinking about the things I remember of the children I have closely interacted with.

The first that came to my mind is D.O my nephew who turns 6 in a few days. Incidentally i spoke to his mother this evening. She said she worried if D will make it to his birthday without a broken bone. He has during this season made friends with another child called Feni who he met at a home in their neighborhood. Their relationship seemed innocent until both decided that the road home is boring. D lives up the hill and the family Feni usually spends the day with lives at the bottom. They usually have a back and forth escorting session which is through the back routes on the hill that has a couple of bushes and undeveloped plots. D has over the last couple of days returned with scraped and bruised and had more undeclared ones which were only discovered during his bath the other day. His mother decided to put an end to his visits only to have Feni appear at her door step yesterday to visit his new found friend. We wouldn’t be very worried about this relationship if it wasn’t for our history with Xavi and Saviour.

D’s older brother PLL turned 10 recently. As a child, he made friends with two other boys who lived in the neighborhood. One day his sister rushed into the house with his piggy bank. It was empty. Upon interrogation, PLL said his friends had broken the bank and taken the money. He must have been 3 or 4years and his friends at most 7. A few weeks later they returned and broke his sister’s piggy bank then asked his if there were any handbags he could give them to check. Thankfully the PLL family shifted and until Feni, we had forgotten about Xavi and Saviour.

I also remember PMO. When he woke up, he would move around the house supposedly preparing to brush his teeth. He would do this for at least an hour before those teeth got to interact with toothpaste. As he moved, he didn’t greet anyone but explained that it was because he was yet to brush.

Anyone: PMO, good morning

PMO: Silence

Anyone: Why won’t you greet? I said good morning.

PMO: Let me first blash(brush) my teeth, take my tea then I will come and glit(greet) you.( Then he would walk away)

Despite all the strange things that children do as they grow up, I believe that with guidance and prayer, they eventually turn up right.

This girl seems to have kept quiet. It’s temporary but it’s a good time to attempt to sleep off.

WINTER BLOGGING CHALLENGE 2020. #WINTERABC2020. DAY 6: SHARE ABOUT 5 BLOGGERS IN YOUR COUNTRY.

My blogging journey is still beautiful and the tales can’t be told without these five bloggers.🤫 My five bloggers are iron women. Akiteng Isabella, she is a Ugandan blogger, Managing Partner at Femme forte Uganda, she is a Proud christian feminist, and i proudly say that she is my mentor. Thats probably the least i […]

WINTER BLOGGING CHALLENGE 2020. #WINTERABC2020. DAY 6: SHARE ABOUT 5 BLOGGERS IN YOUR COUNTRY.

Hair Tales💇

Yesterday for the first time since COVID-19 lock down began, I had a lady come in and wash my hair at home. Through the 60+ days that I have been home, I did my hair once a week or fortnight.

That process is a blog in its own right given that the excercise ended with me looking like I had gone for a swim fully dressed. As we finished, the lady asked if she should hold it in a puff and I said yes. Then the memories crept in.

I was never a hair freak. Through High School students kept negotiating with the Head Teacher to grow their hair and I didn’t understand the craze. I religiously cut mine and didn’t have to hot comb it with an iron. I actively started growing my hair a few months to University so that I could look like a mormal campuser.

My hair grows outwards so it was thick, black but unable to hold an organised puff. While at the University I decided to retouch it. This is the straitening of the hair with chemicals. It continued to grow and fell against back in beautiful curls.

One day, I walked into a salon and cut off all my hair. Just a little remained to protect me from the heat. I felt like my life was beginning afresh. I wonder if men have the same thrill when they cut off their hair.

When I visited my mother and she saw me, she exclaimed and stated that the glory of God had departed from my head. I laughed so hard but could see the pain in my mother eyes.

Keeping short hair is a complication which is worsened if ones hair grows like a weed. I soon realised that short hair wasn’t my portion and barked on a journey to grow my hair. I also made the decision to keep it chemical free.

The worst days were those when the hair was neither short nor long. There’s not many things one can do with indecisive hair as my mum called it. On some days I was so frustrated I just didn’t touch it and moved around looking like an insane person.

Today it has grown. It still grows outwards but is long enough to be held and pinned. And no, it’s not all good days. There are still bad hair days. Days when the comb breaks instead of performing it’s duties and other days when all I get are compliments as I walk around with it.

A few weeks ago, I started thinking that maybe it was the for another chop. And then I got a present. The best electrical hair comb I have laid my eyes on with a note from a dear friend saying she doubted the mane was going anywhere.

Today I met a mobile barber at a friend’s house and the thought crossed my mind again.

And so, the question on my mind this evening is; Should I, Shouldn’t I?

Cheering Oneself ♥️

Our Greatest Cheerleaders are ourselves. No one can cheer you more than you. And if you aren’t doing this, no amount of external support will cause you to thrive.

Not being able to believe in our work is a long term ingredient to failure to grow in whichever field we venture in.

The failure to cheer you means that your work will never be perfect, you will forever be in pursuit of an unachievable goal and sooner or later will altogether give up trying to do anything.

As Human beings we make mistakes everyday. More importantly we are at different levels on our growth journey depending on exposure, experience, knowledge, community to mention but a few.

It is good to constantly remind ourselves that the race we run is our own. People we encounter can encourage us, teach us but the milestones we set are ours. We must measure our growth for us and not against the pressures of the world even if they heavily influence our journey.

If you are not in the habit of cheering yourself, no amount of good charm will satisfy you. If anything a pat on your shoulder will cause you great discomfort and anxiety as you go on about how undeserving you are of the reward.

Sooner or later the world runs out of patience in trying to convince you that you are good enough.

Today, make it a point to criticize yourself as much as you celebrate yourself. No one will honestly do both for you.

Celebrate your small wins, toast to the milestones.

You are amazing

Relationships: The Analogy of the Plant

I am reminded of a time my father asked me how many friends I had. I don’t remember the number i gave him but he immediately told me it was impossible to have those many friends. He asked me if I knew the difference between friends and aquaintances and my mind was blank. I was 11 years old.

Today I understand why he said it was impossible to have the number of friends I had mentioned.

Over the years, I have listened to many people speak about the relationships we are involved in. These vary from family, business, work, love etc but the principle still stands. The two most profound lessons have come from two analogies. One of the tree and the other the Decades of Growth. Today I write of the former.

I dont remember quite well who introduced me to this one but the lesson sticks to this day. This person suggested that everyone we interacted with in life could well easily be like any of the features on a tree.

He told of the people in our lives who are like leaves. They come in and fall as easily as they arrived. I was asked if a tree remembers the many leaves it loses each day and I wasn’t sure because it seems like those that fell were as easily replaced and forgotten. There are people in our lives who would walk out tomorrow and we may never notice they left. We wouldn’t be able to account for their presence because of the insignificance of their contribution. Now this doesn’t mean leaves are not important, they are. They are simply forgettable for as long as the tree is healthy.

We explored those in our lives who are like branches. Our day to day support systems that we may confuse as lifelines. And then he told me that I must never forget that even if a branch was cut, the tree would still live on. There are people who seem like our stability but we could well easily live without them.

We spoke of the stem. The one that stood the test of time. Transported food and kept the tree standing proud and tall. We spoke of it’s commitment through bad weather and in times when branches were cut and leaves all fallen. And yet, it was possible that the tree could be cut at the stem and still live on.

And then, we explored the flowers. Full of beauty and sweet fragrances that warmed our hearts. Those people who are in our lives for a short time but leave a beautiful impact. Many times we forget that they are only there for a season and just like a fresh flower, they wither and die but the memories linger on.

And then he warned me of a common human practice of many attempting to ensure the flower lived beyond it’s time. This usually have rise to the excitement of artificial flowers. A desire to ensure the Memory lasted at the expense of the fragrance and natural beauty. Such relationships he said were as plastic as a tumpeco and only drained the life out of whoever insisted on it.

Finally we spoke of the roots. Usually hidden under the mud. Forgotten by us as we enjoyed the breeze of life and the flowers before us. The roots that give us life when all else is lost.

Many times we take our roots for granted because they are rarely in plain sight. Many times leaves may have your attention more than your roots.

Don’t Forget your support and Lifeline